Increasingly, school scandals at the tertiary level are borne by the parents of the pupils and go up to the siloviki. As in the last few years the psychology of parents has changed, we talked with the teacher of Russian language and literature at Lyceum No. 88 Marina Tolmacheva.

She told why modern moms and dads do not trust teachers, who form this distrust and what role social networks play in this. And also gave advice on how to avoid such conflicts. Details in an interview with JustMedia. en.

- Marina Ivanovna, recently more and more often scandals that could be solved at the school level, parents began to take to a higher level, to bring to the siloviki. For example, the situation in school number 200, where the boy was forbidden to be in the dining room with his food. It came to the prosecutor's office. I think a few years ago this scandal would not have sparked such a scandal. What is the reason, how has the psychology of parents changed in recent years?.

- The attitude of parents towards the school is changing in principle due to the fact that a lot of negative information appears publicly. Everything that happens in school becomes public knowledge. On the one hand, it's good. On the other, no, because people always remember grievances and negative.

But the main trouble is that parents do not trust teachers. It (trust, - note. ed) should not be absolute and be given in advance. This should not be. But the initial respect for the professional who deals with your child must be.

What is the mistrust of parents towards school? They are not going to the teacher now, but to the higher authorities. Because parents are told that the school does not provide educational services at the proper level. Such an arrangement hampers fruitful cooperation. Parents should understand that the school is a place where a child grows and lives, learns the world and learns to communicate.

- And what or who in general forms a mistrust of parents to teachers?.

- Perhaps the parents themselves, who give a negative assessment of this or that phenomenon, without going into the details and essence of school life and not having a special pedagogical education. Parents think that they know better. Not really. You need to be close to the children and be aware of the real school life, and not to communicate with each other in social networks.

- Parents from which families most often scandal, from your point of view, in detail? Are they poor, many children, or on the contrary secured?.

- Large parents are the most calm and stress-resistant. They have already raised several children and understand that in this life the main thing. And most importantly - it's health, a good mood and a child's desire to go to school. Everything Else - Details. Such parents are philosophers.

Negative comes mainly from parents, who often have only one child. These are families who can afford a lot and therefore require a lot from municipal schools and do not understand that we do not have a private school, but a mass one.

These people just have different claims.

- How often does the scandalous parent turn out to be wrong?.

- Very often, and here we are helped by cameras. In our school there was a complaint that the child was hit. All this was checked very simply: we included a record, and the parent saw that there was nothing like this. On the one hand, we are under constant camera sight, on the other - we can protect ourselves.

A child may not understand something. For example, he was taken by the hand, so as not to run along the wet stairs, did not fall. A child can say that he was roughly pulled by the hand. There can not be a conflict-free school, it's a living organism. The only question is how competently the teacher will come out of such situations.

- There are situations when the conflict in the public sphere is born not by the parent of the affected child, but by the relatives of his classmates. Is this a collective mind?.

- This is the collective mind. Modern parents in the region of 30 years, they are children of social networks. Each word they say is discussed in Facebook or Facebook, and without signing up with real names, having fake pages of users. Iz-for it or this it is not clear, whose is mum and from what class the child. And now one, for example, threw information that the child was injured in school. Everyone started discussing, inflating this topic. And the very mother of a child who just bruised his hand, may not know about it.

- But what about the positive interaction of parents in social networks?.

- Yes, of course, it gives. Now there is no problem with quickly delivering information to parents and students. Parents there can discuss important things. For example, the 11th grade is released and it is necessary to choose the design of the final album. Parents met twice at the meeting and could not agree, choose the right option for everyone. In the end, the children looked and said which album they like. And such a simple decision was made thanks to communication in social networks.

- But there are situations when one can not remain silent and parents need to publicly state what happened?.

- This is the case when the child is really hurt and the school tries to hide it. This is wrong - the deeper you push the problem inside, the more it corrodes the body. In the end, it will hit the teachers themselves. If they try to silence a serious conflict, it necessarily flares up elsewhere. If we are talking about the mental and physical health of the child, there is nothing to hide or hide.

If it's about small things, then everything can be solved inside the school and it's not necessary to intervene higher authorities. Come to school, talk, give the teacher an opportunity to explain his position. You will always be listened to and helped at all levels: both administrative and psychological-pedagogical, as we do at the Lyceum. In any conflict, it is important to listen to both sides.

- If it turns out that the teacher is guilty in the conflict. How often does it come to dismissal?.

- In my memory there is no case that would end with administrative or criminal measures.

- How do you manage the conflicts between the child and the teacher and between the students themselves?.

- We invite parents (legal representatives). If not mama or dad, then grandparents come. We hold small pedagogical councils and if necessary, we turn to a psychologist.

In order to prevent teenage suicide, we invited parents to a meeting. Have told all in detail: what signs, on what it is necessary to pay attention, how to communicate with the teenager, what measures to accept, if it is necessary. Social risks of all kinds become the theme of the classroom hours, they are devoted to the lessons of the parent lecture center of the "Dialogue" center, with which our lyceum has been cooperating for the past 10 years.

- How modern are parents involved in the learning process?.

- Parents of elementary school pupils know everything about us, up to every word in the child's homework. They are very attentive, they exchange information in social networks. They correspond with each other every day, discuss what was done and who did not understand something. - What recommendations can you give your parents to avoid scandals?.

- The father and mother of the schoolboy should remember that the teacher and him, and the child is not an enemy, but a friend.

- Advice to parents: less to communicate in social networks. There is an e-mail where everything is fixed, there is a signature and address.

You can call teachers, come to school. Discuss it is not clear that under an unknown name - it is not necessary. It takes a lot of time and is not as effective as it seems at first glance.

- Teachers need to keep in touch and have good relations with alumni, in our Lyceum it's a long tradition. Former graduates bring their children, and those - grandchildren. This is the most convincing evidence of the confidence of parents. And we are proud that in our school such student dynasties are.